A Heart Full of Gratitude | Sarah Douglas

She sat there, waiting to be called. Not nervous, just patiently waiting for her turn. I spotted her, and not having met her during screening, curiously went over to interview her. I was interested in what her experience was as a teenager with a cleft, in China. Was it similar to mine? Did people accept her? Did they ask questions? Did she run into any obstacles having a cleft? There was so much I wanted to know.

He Xue Fang, aged 15 (November 2016).

Fifteen year old He Xue Fang was there with both her parents. This was her 3^rd operation. She was getting a secondary lip repair, nose repair, and fistula repair. She had had her first operation at four months old, with a domestic group in a hospital in Dali, where both her parents work. She has never attended any check-ups, and learnt to speak by herself, without a speech therapist.

At first I asked the usual questions about her cleft, and any other details I thought important when writing a story about someone. But then we got talking about school, her hobbies, and anything else that might interest a teenager. It was amazing how much we could relate. She was a little nervous at first, but soon warmed up, letting her lovely personality shine through.

What I found interesting when talking to her, were her interests. I discovered that we had a few things in common, as well as learning things about her that make her who she is. Her favourite subject is history. She loves to paint. She loves watching Japanese cartoons, or anime, and listens to music of that same genre. She prefers to stay in during the evening. She dislikes maths and physics, and despite not liking those two subjects, the one science subject she does like is biology. She was very much interested in animals, and wanted to volunteer to care for animals, and possibly work in a zoo in the future.

A photo with Xue Fang, before her operation.

During all the talk about school and subjects, she told me she was learning English. She then proceeded to tell me that she was no good. I asked her to say something. At first, she was a little shy about saying anything, but then she said a few things; she even understood some of the things I said!  I told her that she was doing well, and not to give up. She smiled, and for the rest of the conversation she even attempted to say some things in English.

As she was an older patient, I asked her about bullying, and other people’s reactions to her cleft. She told me that only her very close friends knew about it, but she has encountered plenty of mean comments, and as a child, other children didn’t want to be friends with her. It was great to get to talk to her, as I was able to connect with her on a different level to that with the small children and babies. I told her things about my experience as well, so we got to hear each other’s stories, which was nice.

A last photo with Xue Fang ,the day after her operation.

When we were done talking, I asked her if she wanted to join me in colouring in the grown up colouring sheets. She had already been asked by someone prior to our conversation, but this time she agreed, settling down on the mat with me. We sat there in a relaxed silence, colouring in the intricate designs. Time passed, and soon enough her name was being called. She immediately got up, and confidently went in for surgery.

It was so inspiring talking to Xue Fang, I got to see just how brave and unique she was. Although I was told I was the one who inspired her, encouraging her to never give up and keep going. I do think though, that she inspired me more.

Xue Fang and her parents.

I had been waiting to see her after her operation, but never got the right opportunity while she was in post-op. When they were leaving, they came to child life and said goodbye. Then, as they were going down the stairs, Xue Fang’s mother stopped and turned to face me, tears streaming out of her eyes. “Thank you”, she said, in English. We hugged, my eyes starting to mist over. I was so moved by her gratitude, not to mention the effort she made to say something in English, even if it was only a simple phrase. To me, I hadn’t really done much, I had just tried to encourage Xue Fang, and keep her busy while she waited for surgery. But to them, I had done much more. And I will never forget those words that her mother said that day, no matter how many times I hear someone say them. In a way, they inspired me even more. And for that, I will forever be grateful.

I feel truly humble to have the opportunity to work with an organisation like Operation Smile. You get to meet so many amazing people like Xue Fang, and it is always an incredible experience to see the work that they do.